Saturday 26 December 2015

Very Merry Christmas

From the chimney of your heart
I come with my pen-deer like claus santa
Bringing you this little gift of smile
Cause you've been a good friend through this mile
I have to wait till the night is silent
And the stars are brightly shinning
So I can write you this poem as...
I wish you a VERY MERRY CHRISTMAS

The Government is Irresponsible

Finally we have come to the last Saturday of the year 2015, which by the way doesn't sound like a good news to a lot of single women who probably have gotten prophecies that the year will not end without them being in their husband's house well unfortunately for some of them we can not declare the year inconclusive and have a rerun...

But of all things I think 2015 was an interesting year especially in the Nigerian political scene. Today i just want recall some of the ridiculous moments. I'll start with the late Abubakar Audu of blessed memory well his case though tragic but was funny at the same (this is what theatre art practitioners call tragicomedy). Don't go judging me on this one you should at least analyse the situation with me, a man who is close to becoming the governor of his state die just few hours before the final result could be announced (I call this one DOA "death on arrival").

It would have ended there but his supposed deputy governor refused to rerun as a deputy governor to who ever was to be chosen by the political party as replacement, which to me was rather ironic choosing to the fact that he has agreed on first hand to be a deputy governor so why decline now, well na e sabi

Next was the case of Mr president appointing himself as petroleum minister and there was a heavy fuel scarcity over the nation well if that was the so much preached change we were expecting then I think we got it wrong... and talking about change I think the bus drivers and conductors will not agree with them judging by the lack of change for passengers who travel with them...

Meanwhile, why we were busy crying about fuel scarcity they opened Dasuki's gate revealing a list of names that benefited from a certain money released on security bill from the past government.. it was quite an interesting list though with names of high ranking government officials and business men, including people who were tipped for services rendered, it was a huge amount of money though and the way it went round you could bet that was the national cake we've so much heard about since we were little.. well for all I could say about this case is that Dasuki is such a snitch I mean who would mention everybody's name just to save his neck... I am more careful about who I collect money from these days before someone Dasuki on me...

Finally before I sign out for the year I just want to say thank you to every one who has been reading my posts.. you are the main reason I write every Saturday and midweek maybe not every Saturday but at least every time I write..

And I think we have an irresponsible government, please don't get me wrong the government has never claimed responsibility on anything that has happened in this country rather they said Jonathan is responsible if you think I'm lying ask Lai Muhammed

I think I need to stop here before I run out of ink and this one our law makers now know how to use social media after spending tax payers money on learning how to now they want to lock us up for talking about the government...

I think I've said too much let me give peace a chance and #prayfornigeria to get better and catch you on the flip side of 2016 with more satirical post

Wednesday 9 December 2015

Buhari's Fund Raising Agenda

After a very long break I'm taking my time out to disturb your little peace. It is no longer news that Nigeria as a nation is very broke, I mean can't pay salary broke in fact state governors are working on cutting down minimum wage from eighteen thousand naira to only God knows what (as if 18,000 is not meagre enough), just to keep up with the salary scheme..

But from the look of things I think the Federal Government is seriously working on stabilising the economy at least if not making it better than it was, I guess this will explain all the foreign trips that the president cum petroleum minister and (foreign affairs minister) had to put that in bracket cause it's not his real office but I think on the other hand his foreign trips are yielding fruits at least Lai Muhammad cannot lie about that one..

From what I've noticed he has developed a fund raising technique which besides fighting corruption and retrieving looted funds from corrupt office holders is imposing fines indirectly, MTN nigeria was the first victim and then they brought the anti social media bill which is still undergoing scrutiny in the Senate which if passed the penalty is two million naira fine or two years in prison what a fine strategy of making money for the government....

Now my recent concern is the announcement made by the minister if works and power Babatunde Fashola informing us that the toll gate which was long gone and forgotten will be doing a come back like a fugitive on exile that is due to return, and I guess they are expecting us Nigerians to embrace it with open arms, I think that is a very good development taking us to the future where every country in the world is standing right now....

Me what is my own sef, I don't even have a car and I so love the future Nigeria is creating for us, come to think of it FG will not pay us that five thousand naira at least we would have used it to buy data and post on social media maybe by now they would have made their first two million and how would they have gotten any culprit since they claim they don't have our datas...

Let me stop before they come and arrest me for slander and my ink is almost finished Ok bye... will be back with more satire.